28 March 2007

Boot 'N Paddle - March 9, 2007

Being outside is great and all, but sometimes it is just way too cold out there. Like take this past week, it must have dropped below freezing two or three times! Cold!
So what happens to your day when that outdoor excursion you’ve been planning is called off on account of cold weather? You do something in the only place that’s not outdoors, indoors.
Once you’ve made the decision not to go outside, you first need to think of an excuse to tell your nosy friends, because frankly, “it’s too cold” sounds a little wimpy. This is pretty easy to do. Try out, “My car wouldn’t start,” or “My binding snapped because it was so cold,” or you can just say you don’t want to talk about it, that way your friend feels bad.
So the big thing is what to do inside. Try going for a car ride. The car is in a bit of gray area between out and in but I’d say it’s more in than out.
Check out some back roads. Find a sweet little spot to bring a special someone later in the spring. For you guys, girls love guys with knowledge of back roads. Trust me.
Being in the car will give you the illusion of being outside but will allow you to regulate the temperature. Sitting really close to any window and looking out of it is another way to trick your brain into thinking you’re outside.
If you don’t have a car and are tired of sitting in front of the window, try some of these activities…
Movies are great. Watch one. Also, a well-shot outdoor scene can really make you feel like you’re there too (hello Seven Years in Tibet!)
*Watching network television programming and the surfing the Internet are activities you want to avoid substituting for an outdoor experience. Some computer games are acceptable…like Kings Quest. (Right, Hub?)
Make a to-do list. I started making to-do lists and find myself to be much more productive. Add long-term goals as well as small tasks. Frequently crossing off items will really give you a feeling of accomplishment.
Games are fun. Try picking up Pog or Magic the Gathering––actually, wait, don’t do that.
Sleep feels good but is boring when you think about it.
Have a conversation. How cold it is outside is definitely a good conversation piece.
Combat the outdoors with simulation summer… swim in the pool, sit in the sauna. You might try pretending to buy flowers at the florist just to feel like you’re really in a summertime atmosphere. Be careful about the amount of time you spend doing this. Store employees generally get nervous when someone stands in the corner of their store with their eyes closed for extended periods of time. Buy a balloon or something to keep the florist from getting suspicious.
Try an indoor sport that feels like it’s outside. Spelunking in the basement…just don’t get too close to the hot water heater.
Set up a tent inside. This is quirky and fun.
Constant visitation to a tanning bed will make other people think you’re outside a lot. That’s almost as good as the real thing!

Bundle up more than you ever have before and go outside!

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